Youth Ministry On a Tight Budget

So the financial committee chair person comes to you and says: "Good news! We've reworked your budget...you have $100 to spend for the year for each of your programs. If you could spend less that'd be great!"

Ouch. Double ouch if you're working with several different programs!

You have a couple of options:

1. Start writing your own curriculum, which takes a lot more time or
2. Find quality curriculum/teaching material at a discounted price.
   

When working with church funds, you obviously want to be the best steward that you can with the money that people have given for the work of God's Kingdom. But that doesn't mean you have to skimp on quality to get the most bang for your buck!

Let me give a couple of ideas on how to save money on buying quality teaching material.

First, check out sites like Amazon.com and barnesandnoble.com. Just a couple weeks ago I was looking for some material for our Jr. High class and someone recommended to me the Dares From Jesus series by Mark Oestricher. If you go online and buy this material, it's $15. But I bought it from a used book dealer through Amazon for $1.50. No, I'm not missing a zero. One dollar and fifty cents!

When I received it in the mail I was astonished that such a great tool was available at such a low price and in perfect condition!

Secondly, check out discount Christian bookstores. Here you can find books that are either out of print or from the previous year. I bought Nelson's Annual Youth Ministry Sourcebook which is a great resource for youth ministry talks for less than $5. I also picked up this great book for about $2. Incidently, that book is available through amazon for 44 cents.

So having a small budget is not a huge deal when it comes to buying teaching resources. You have to shop around a little bit, but you could easily fill your library with tons of teaching materials for under $100.

Monday Weigh-In #2

As of 5:05am this morning I weighed in at 196 pounds - I met my 2 pound goal for the week!

Surprisingly! I was not as careful with my food as I should of been last week. Saturday I ate over 2600 calories (Cheeseburger in Paradise is my personal weakness!) Not at all what I had hoped for but still managed to pull off the loss.

As I think about it, I'm not sure I'll make the goal to 175. Not because of lack of willpower, but because of weight gain from muscle. I started weight lifting, and when you put on muscle, you gain weight (the good kind). This is why you often see on the Biggest Loser some people either lose very little or actually gain a little weight.

But the good news is that muscle burns up to 15 times more calories than fat alone. So that's great news!

Monday Weigh-In

Today is CRAZY busy so I'll make this short.

The past 3 months I've taken a short hiatus for my weight loss. Between summer camps, CIY and crazy schedules, it was nearly impossible to lose and keep a schedule of exercise.

So today I officially start again and plan on coming on here each Monday morning to give an update on my weigh in. This helps keep me accountable.

The Goal: 175 Pounds
Target Ideal Weight Loss a week: 2 pounds
Today's weigh in: 198 pounds
Estimated Date of Goal: November 3rd (12 weeks)

I appreciate your prayers and encouragement through this journey. It's been difficult and no way I could accomplish these goals without your support. Thank you so much!

Weekly Cuteness

To Be Hungry...

The purpose of this post isn't to show that I'm a "Super Christian" because I'm not in any way. Nor am I trying to show off what I do. I just want to be able to share the way God has been blessing me through one on one times with him. With that being said...

This morning I had an amazing quiet time. I think I've finally found the groove that connects me to God in my quiet time. Someone once said "If you're bored during your quiet time, God probably is too." That made sense to me, and I decided there had to be some changes in our quiet time together.

There was a time when I was against having a quiet time with God, and I know some of you will gasp and wonder what I'm talking about but let me explain. I had a professor in Bible college that related our relationship with God to hunger. When we get hungry, we eat. When we hunger for God, we should eat. To me, that made sense. And then I learned about how each person connects to God in a different way. Some connect through singing. Some through prayer. Nature. Fasting. Silence. Solitude. Giving. I started to put things together that you don't necessarily have to have a quiet time every day where you read your Bible, but maybe taking one of those elements and doing it when you felt "hungry".

The problem is, our stomachs are naturally designed to tell us when we're hungry. We haven't really trained ourselves to listen to when our souls are hungry. I found that I was actually starving my soul AND I wasn't giving it a normal diet of different foods.

Scripture HAS to be part of our connecting with God otherwise we're having one way conversations. We do all the talking and we refuse to allow God to talk to us. Scripture is the way God connects to us on a one on one basis and shows us what we need to do and what we need our attitude to be. Thankfully, I figured this out a couple of years ago and it's been my life line to God in ministry. Now I'm going to just give a model of how I connect to God, feel free to end your reading now if you don't really care so much, I understand ;)

Here is how I connect:

1. First thing I do when I get into my office is open my Bible and either a) read where I feel God guiding me to read. b) Continuing on with a book. I read through the Gospels last year and now I'm reading through some Psalms.
2. I sometimes have a book that I'm reading and I'll read a chapter. Currently I'm reading this book and it's been amazing!
   
3. I have a journal that I keep regular entries in. I have a hard time praying out loud/in my head. My mind goes every where. So when I am able to sit down and write out my prayers, not only do I have a record that I can go back to and see how God answered my prayer, but I can focus on what I'm praying about. Gives me a little more concentration.
4. Sometimes I'll go up to our local forestry and take a lunch, a book, my bible and my journal and hike up to the tallest point in the county. I just have a quiet time and read and pray and it's just a wonderful time to spend with God. I call it a day of refreshment.

Spending personal time with God is essential in any believers daily life. He refreshes us. He corrects us. He encourages us. He disciplines us. He loves us through his words. Take time to be in his word.

Willow Creek Repents?

For those that know me well enough, know that I really cannot stand Willow Creek. I've never liked their methods, their shallow practices, and the fact that they charge outrageous prices for their materials.

Anyways, I came across this article this morning about how they decided their programs were just wrong. A direct quote from Bill Hybels:

"We made a mistake. What we should have done when people crossed the line of faith and become Christians, we should have started telling people and teaching people that they have to take responsibility to become ‘self feeders.’ We should have gotten people, taught people, how to read their bible between service, how to do the spiritual practices much more aggressively on their own."

It's an article from last year, but still worth the read. Read the rest here.

The Weight Loss Continues...

I started the weight loss attempt on February 4th and as of today, July 16th, I've lost 43 pounds. Here is my before and after picture:
It's really hard to believe I was so heavy. I really didn't notice it. You always notice you're a "couple of pounds" over but that's about it. I had no idea I had crept up to 240 pounds.

Today, I'm under what I weighed my Senior year of High School. My ultimate goal is 180, which is (according to most height/weight measurements) still "overweight" but I'm not really going to care at that point. But we'll see.


I have lots of people ask me "How have you done it?" So I've compiled a list of some of the steps I've taken to lose 40+ pounds. A word of caution, I am in no way an expert. I learn more and more everyday even 6 months after I've started this. This is just what I would call "practical advice":

1. I counted calories. At first, this idea scared me because I was like "Oh my goodness, how am I going to look at all of these containers and keep track of it all?" It was a lot easier than I thought it would be. I found a website to help keep track of what I ate and the calories and nutrition content of each item.
   
2. I ate 1600 calories a day and rarely no more than that. You can find calculators online which tell you approximately how many calories your body naturally uses. I used 2600 calories a day naturally, so i was left with burning 1000 calories a day from food alone...but then I added..
3. Exercise! I didn't exercise at first, I gradually got myself into the groove of the diet then exercise. But someone at the church gave us a $100 gift card for Wal-Mart (anonymously) and I used that money to buy a stationary bicycle. I started with 20 minutes in front of the TV and gradually bumped it up to 30 minutes. It was hard at first, it burned! Now I use the harder difficulty settings to get a better workout.
4. Remember that 3500 calories equals 1 pound. And that goes for both gaining and losing. So if you cut a 1000 calories a day, you'll lose about 2.5 pounds a week. If you can put in 30 minutes of exercise a day thats another half pound.
5. Don't beat yourself up over the occasional miss. So you ended up going 500 calories over for a day...it's not the end of the world and it certainly isn't the end of the diet. You'll have those days.
   
6. I stopped drinking calories. For example: Coca-Cola in a 20oz bottle has over 200 calories. A large sweet tea has 300 calories! Holy Crap! Thats almost a whole meal in calories! Water of course is best, but if you just can't stand water go to diet soda or have tea with splenda. Fruit juice is pretty bad for you too as it's loaded with sugar!
7. I started paying attention to serving sizes. Believe it or not, butter is not all that horrible. The problem is that people put 3 to 4 times the amount of butter on something that they should. This is especially true of salad dressing. I remember one time when someone was on a "diet" and got a salad with 5 or 6 servings of ranch (most ranch is 150 calories per serving). She had a lot more fat in her salad than I did in my burger! If you want the butter or the dressing, portion it out first and stick to that portion.
8. Realize that maintaining weight is A LOT better than gaining. That means that when you get on that scale and you weigh the same today as you did a week ago...that is still a success! Our weight fluctuates so much in a given day. Some people retain a lot of water at times, you have to figure in the weight of the food you're still digesting, etc...lots of factors to consider. I only weighed myself on Monday mornings because that was the same time every week that I could count on.
   
9. I ate what I wanted to. Just a lot less of it. It's not uncommon for Carrie to want a pizza in the middle of the week. So instead of eating 3 or 4 slices like I used to, I would just eat 2. Or if I wanted to "splurge" I would eat less in the day so I could have that extra slice. You can still eat what you want, you just have to fit it in to your daily calorie goals. Tomorrow night we're going to Cheeseburger in Paradise and I'm going to get a half pound burger with a side of fries. So tomorrow morning I'll have some yogurt with fruit (150 calories), lunch will be a chicken salad (150 calories), and dinner can be 1300 calories. It's probably not the healthiest way to do it, but it curbs cravings. Lately I've been eating less calorie snacks and having soft serve ice cream after dinner.
10. A typical day of food for me:

• Breakfast: 2 cups of oatmeal cooked in skim milk. Coffee with 3 teaspoons of sugar and 2 teaspoons of non-dairy creamer (400 calories)
• Morning snack: Apple (80 calories)
• Lunch: Turkey Sandwich on whole wheat with lettuce, tomato, nonfat cheese (300 calories)
• Afternoon snack: Animal crackers (120 calories)
• Dinner: Grilled chicken breast, potato, steamed broccoli with butter, whole wheat bread. (420 calories)
• Evening snack: Fruit smoothie, bowl of cereal, Ice cream, or whatever I can with the calories I have left figure about 150 calories.
  
• Total Day Calories: 1470. Which gives you enough to play with some condiments such as butter or sour cream for a potato or maybe a bag of chips with lunch.
  

As you can see I eat a ton of food in the day, which was surprising for me. I always though diets were there to make you feel hungry all day. There are many times when I find it hard to actually use all my calories in a single day, I'm just too full!

I'm not going to say it's been easy. There have been days where I just wanted to go to McDonalds and have my regular Big Mac Meal with large fries and a coke (1400 calories). It was REALLY hard when we had 5 boxes of Girl Scout Cookies! I stuck to 2 cookies a day...which was really hard. But I was finally determined to do something about it.

If you have any questions please feel free to ask!

...Flaw...

You know that one thing that you have that you don't want anyone else to see? It's that one weakness...or flaw that you shamefully hide because you absolutely don't want anyone to see or acknowledge it.

I have one.

It scares the potatoes out of me when I think about someone calling it out on me.

And it happened yesterday.

Not just by one person, but by a collective group of people.

It hurt.

Now before you get all upset, this wasn't by anyone at our church or anything like that. But when someone calls your flaw out to you, it's a frightening experience. You're laid open. Completely bare and naked. The wound already open and salt being rubbed into it. It's not a fun experience. Over and over again I run the words through my mind like a broken record and each time the sting is still there.

I guess I shouldn't be surprised. I'm not perfect. As I frequented mutter to myself "I've yet to master the ability to be superhuman." I still get things wrong and will continue to get things wrong.

There is comfort, however, in the words of Jesus and Paul:

"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." - 1st Corinthians 12:9,10


And in the words of the wise Hannah Montana: "Nobody's perfect, I gotta work it again and again till I get it right."

Oh the Joys of Summer Youth Ministry

Lately I had been feeling guilty for taking my afternoons off from the office. In college it was pounded into my head that a minister should work an average of 55 hours a week so "...no one can complain that you don't work!" I thought that was fair advice and that's what I've done. My wife has continually told me that I "work WAY too much", but have since learned from people much wiser than I that a fair amount is from 45 to 50 hours a week.

So I've felt REALLY guilty about taking off in the afternoons to go home and relax. So I sat down this morning to figure out my official Summer hours between camp, CIY, VBS, etc...and came up that since June 1st, I've worked an average of 52.33 hours a week.

So today at noon I'm going to go home and feel guilty no longer!

I'm curious about the hourly averages of other youth workers. If anyone has any insight into that, I'd surely like to know! While talking with my former youth pastor, he asked me why I put in extra office hours since there were other programs that took up time. I found out that he does what I now do, work from 8am till noon and take the afternoon off to be with his family.

According to Group Magazine:

"The average hours worked per week reported by youth pastors crept up slightly, from 45 to 48. That means your ministry keeps you on the clock much longer than your neighbors. The average workweek across the country is 42 hours. You're basically among the three in 10 American workers who put in at least 49 hours on the job every week. But if you subtract the number of hours spent eating pizza and drinking diet Coke..."

Each church is different. I know there are area churches that require their staff to be in the office till 5pm (ouch!) Some churches require very little official office hours but require much more home visitation and hospital visitation.

So if you are a youth worker (or just happen to have a love OF youth workers...or just like to make comments...I'll take all I can get!) and are able to participate in this discussion, your voice is welcome and appreciated!

Why yes, I'll pray for your Gas!

I'm still not sure what I think about this.

My initial reaction is: "Aren't there other areas that could better use your time in prayer?"

Top 10 Worst Selling Youth Ministry Books

by Scott Firestone (Group Magazine)

10. Time Shares and Texas Hold 'Em: Creative Fundraising Ideas
9. No Halos for Halo: Why Jesus Hates Video Games and Video Gamers
8. The Gaithers: Rockers for Jesus or the Devil's Marionettes
7. The Care Bears: Leading Teens Down the Dark Road of the Occult
6. SUPERGOOD Life Lessons From SUPERBAD - Includes CD with Video Clips!
5. Budget and Salaries: Youth Ministry on $1 a Day!
4. Defensive Driving Tips for Your 15-Passenger Metal Box of Death On Wheels
3. 101 Flannelgraph Bible Lessons for Teenagers
2. Chubby Bunny: How an Addiction to Marshmellows Ruined My Ministry
1. Junior High Bible Studies: Song of Solomon

Argh!

Just when you think you've had an awesome week...

...something causes it to come crashing down...

My Personality Type: INFP (It's me word for word)

From the Myers/Briggs Type Indicator (My comments in blue)

INFP

INFPs focus deeply on their values, and they devote their lives to pursuing the ideal. They often draw people together around a common purpose and work to find a place for each person within the group. They are creative, and they seek new ideas and possibilities. They quietly push for what is important to them, and they rarely give up. While they have a gentleness about them and a delightful sense of humor, they may be somewhat difficult to get to know and may be overlooked by others. They are at their best making their world more in line with their internal vision of perfection.

Living

INFPs decide early on what is important for them, what is of value. They tend to rely on themselves for direction and are reticent to ask others for help. They would rather do things themselves, to make sure they are done properly. INFPs have found this to be both a strength and a curse. Depending only on themselves and being careful not to show mistakes to others is important. As teens, INFPs may have a bit of a rebellious streak. They may argue with those who hold different values than they do (My class in World Religions comes to mind...as well as starting arguments with any Baptist I could find!). They are also likely to have a small, close set of friends with whom they share good times. In the comfort of those close relationships, they can relax and are often quite entertaining, since they see the world in a different and special way. Their sense of humour is readily apparent. However, unless an INFP finds an appreciation for his or her uniqueness and personal values, he or she may feel like an odd person out.

When they set their minds on things, INFPs are not likely to give up easily, yet because of their outward gentleness, they do not show their determination. They may not take a direct path, but somehow they reach their dreams.

As young adults, INFPs may have some difficulty finding the ideal career and the ideal mate, in part because of that very word 'ideal'. They have a vision in mind of what they want, yet reality may not follow suit. They may make several starts and stops in their career until they find a comfortable place for themselves.

INFPs have a need for perfection in connection with their personal values. They become frustrated with those who dwell on trivialities. (ie. Board meetings where 45 minutes is spent deciding on whether or not to include a stamp on a postcard mailing)

INFPs need a purpose beyond the paycheck. They become burned out easily if their job does not fit their value system; they may not feel good enough about what they have achieved and, as a result, may undervalue themselves and their contributions. (Bolded because this is so true)

In retirement, INFPs need to look back and feel that they have led a worthwhile life that has made a difference. They want time for a variety of activities, including travel. They may also be very attached to their family and enjoy special visits with them. (I'll try to remember that)

Working

At work, INFPs contribute their creativity, their value system, and their ability to work with others. They are able to see the larger picture and how specific programs fit in. They do not dwell on the trivialities or the details. Their job must be fun, although not racous, and it must be meaningful to them. (Perhaps this is why I'm a youth minister?) They need a strong purpose in their work. They want to be recognized and valued, without undue attention given to them. (ie. Minister Appreciation Day: I'm so embarrassed!) They may become embarrassed when make the center of attention. (See!) As a result, they may undersell their strengths in order to avoid being singled out and made to feel conspicuous. They would rather have their worth be noticed gradually over time.

INFPs like to work with cooperative people committed to the same values that they are. They can become bothered when they see others working at cross purposes, especially when conflict is overt. They do not like competition or bureaucracy. (Church politics) They need privacy. Calm and quiet appeal to them, as does time and space for reflection. People usually like working with INFPs even though they may not know them well.

INFPs are quite disorganized. (It's an organized mess!) But when tasks at hand are important and best done in an organized way, INFPs strive to do so. Practicality is not a driving force for INFPs. Things that traditionally belong together may not be placed together because the INFP does not see it as necessary. They have trouble finishing what they start because of their perfectionistic nature. When they do finish a project, they may not consider it done 'for good.' Projects can always be improved upon, revised, and reworked, and therefore INFPs find it hard to bring tasks to closure. Because they are able to visualize the finished product long before it is done, the actual completion is of less importance. (I've been working on camp for 5 months now and I still don't think I'm 'done' even though we leave on Sunday.)

INFPs prefer occupations in which they can be involved in making the world better. Having their heart in their work is important to them. These occupations also allow for an element of creativity and flexibility. INFPs are particularly interested to be counselor, editor, education consultant, English teacher, fine arts teacher, journalist, psychologist, religious educator, social scientist, social worker, teacher, writer, and other occupations that engage their values. (Every one of those appeals to me believe it or not)

Leading

The INFP leadership style is subtle, gentle, indirect, and inclusive of others. INFPs do not confront people head-on, but rather work with them and through them to get the job done. Their style is not an aggressive one but is highly persistent; only reluctantly do INFPs assume leadership roles. (So true)

They lead with their values in mind, and these guide them. They prefer not to take a hands-on approach with others but to allow them to achieve in independent ways. They are facilitative rather than directive. (Delegation!) They encourage others by appreciation and praise. Critiquing others does not come easily to them.

INFPs seldom confront situations directly, in part because they do not like conflict. Whenever possible, they would rather wait for a situation to work itself out, since they trust that people will work things through. They do not like following all the rules and regulations, but they are not overtly rebellious. They seek to get things done in their own style. (Yeah that gets me in trouble some times)

Leisure

Leisure activities are very important to INFPs, but at times it is difficult for them to separate work from play. When a new leisure pursuit is found, INFPs typically do a great deal of research. They may read many books and make several phone calls to dig for information. (Wikipedia has been a great source of learning new things. When I started getting into Star Trek I would spend a great deal of time just reading about the Star Trek Universe...now I"m reading about Jeeps!)

Many of the INFPs' leisure activities are done alone --- reading, listening to music, and gardening are some activities likely to appeal to them. Reflection time and the opportunity to make sure things are right are important. INFPs often enjoy leisure pursuits with loved ones as well. When they want to be sociable, they can be exceedingly charming and outgoing. Their flexibility, gentleness, and sense of humour can make them quite popular in social situations.

Loving

For the INFP, love is a very deep commitment, and one that is not easily attained. They have ideals, and therefore reality may be carefully scrutinized.

With their ideal firmly envisioned, the first date with that special person is carefully planned and prepared for, and often every aesthetic thing is taken care of. The flowers are in place, the right wine is ordered, and the proper meal is prepared.

INFPs may have difficulty sharing their feelings about others. They keep so many of those feelings inside that they may forget to tell their partner how much they love and appreciate them. (Yeah we've had a couple of 'discussions' about that) They also need reminders of their partner's love.

When things go wrong in a relationship, the INFP takes it to heart but does not readily discuss it with others. They may not be willing to communicate to let others know how they are feeling. When scorned, they are very hurt and may overreact in an almost maudlin way.

Everytime I take the Myers/Briggs test I always get the same result. I took it the first time when I was 19 and it's always the same. It's just me, word for word. It's funny to read something like this and then understand why you do the things you do.

Anyways, I would encourage anyone to take this test. There is an application on Facebook that allows you to take it and you can find it on my profile in facebook.

Church Membership Sucks!

Church photo directories frustrate me.

They're a great tool and all, but everyone comes out of the woodwork for them! I saw a family last night that I haven't seen in church in the 3 years that I've been here, not even for Christmas Eve or Easter.

I remember a conversation I had with a lady a couple of months ago. It went something like this:

"You're the youth minister at Reddington? Well I've been a member of that church for 45 years! I haven't been there in about 30 though..." And this was a woman who was able to get around well but for whatever reason, she had chosen not to go to church.

So that raises the question: What makes you a church member?

Some people think you join a church to get that recognition, "I'm a part of this organization."

Some people think you join a church because their whole family does.

I think too many take church membership too seriously.

Who cares about membership!

What about servantship?

You can quote me on this: I feel a lot more respect for the dedicated Sunday school teacher than I do the dedicated tither. It's easy to throw money in and feel like you're doing something good. Don't get me wrong, we all need to take part in growing God's Kingdom financially...but I think God is more in to serving others on a more practical level than by giving money to a church/organization.

So that's my rant for today.

Tranformational Thinking

The Once a Youth Pastor... blog has dramatically influenced a change in how I perceive 'effectiveness' in youth ministry and how youth ministry SHOULD be done. If you haven't seen this blog you have to. Go through and read it all. Most of the posts are short and to the point but it has been instrumental in reforming my ministry paradigm.

In one of his latest posts he lists the 5 questions that helped him rethink youth ministry.

1. When was the last time we saw teens and their parents inside the walls of the church discussing spiritual things together?
2. Do we equip and support parents of teens even a fraction as much as the teens that walk through their doors?
3. How much time does our church/youth ministry invest in parents?
4. What percentage of our youth ministry programs involves parents as participants, not just chaperones or leaders?
5. Which of our ministries communicate that parents are the most important part of a teen’s faith formation?

Again, this is his, I don't want to take any credit from his work and pass along his site so you can be blessed by his words. I'm going to print off those questions and put them in a spot that I will see daily.

So...

I had hoped to come back from my blogging hiatus, but it doesn't look like it's going to happen.

This June I will be in my office a total of 4 days.

4 days.

I hope to have a lot to talk about when I come back :-D

Charlie the Unicorn 2

If you haven't seen Charlie the Unicorn 1, stop what you're doing and go to YouTube and search for Charlie the Unicorn and watch it so you can fully enjoy Charlie the Unicorn 2. Otherwise, enjoy!

The Media (Not so evil as you think)

Quick post before the service.

Most people blame the media for misrepresenting news or not publishing news of "substance". I know I often get ticked off when the war in Darfur gets 10 seconds of news time and the cafeteria worker who saved a little girl from choking gets 4 full minutes (true story). But is the media to blame? Or is it that people just don't care about things going on in the world elsewhere?

I present the evidence. CNN's "Top News" according to page views:

1. Jenna's big Wedding Day
2. Ex Manager: OJ confessed
3. 'Idol' finalist's dad banned
4. Can Clinton Land the plane?
5. Obama closes in on Superdelegates.
6. Price of snail mail creeps up
7. ....you get the point


What does this mean for youth ministry? Maybe exercising an awareness of what's going on in the world and having compassion for people in other countries. More thoughts on this later.

Movie Trailers that are Destroying America

Things are getting Busy!

To my faithful readers:

Things are getting busy with school ending and the summer months coming up. Youth workers around the country are bracing for a summer of activities, retreats, camps and trips. Updates may be slow coming in these next few months so I apologize.